I started this deployment with my heart & mind in the right place, I'm feeling very strong and positive, things are very different this time around. But I may be reaching my breaking point. The tears have yet to fall down my face, but it may feel better if I could.
Today I see how my children differ from one another. In the past when Daddy has left, Chelsea had a hard time verbalizing and expressing how she felt, she would act out, she ended up with some behavioral issues that with time and seeing a play therapist we've worked on how to make her feel better and handle it differently when daddies away.
Typically Gavin did not act out, but he longed for a mans attention. Any time he saw a man in uniform he'd cling on to them for dear life. But this time, Gavin is 2 1/2 yrs old, and he is acting like someone or something took over his little body. Seriously I didn't expect him to act out in any way, I was more worried and concerned about Chelsea, because she is the only who's always demonstrated her struggles in the past.
I know I must show compassion, and I do feel for him, but I don't know how to get him to be the little boy I love so much! This morning when I dropped him off at daycare he told me he didn't want to stay. He clung onto my leg, and didn't want to let go. He didn't cry, but he wasn't happy. He hasn't acted like that since the first day he started daycare (almost a year ago).
He's so angry, he screams for hours. He kicks, throws things. He doesn't want to sleep for nap time or bedtime. If you know this child, he LOVES sleep. He's slept through the night at 3wks old, and I'd always have to WAKE him from nap and in the morning. But not anymore, he refuses to sleep. He wakes up all night long-as if he were an infant, and is up by 6am everyday. I'm doing my best to be consistant & repetitive. Time outs don't work. A friend of mine suggested to distract him by blowing in his face-HUGE negative, I just end up out've breath. Try things with the toys, but nothing changes his stinky mood. Friends have suggested that maybe he's done with naptimes. Which would be totally acceptable, except that he's a terror and absolute nightmare because he's so exhausted. And then he still fights bed time, doesn't sleep through the night & wakes at the crack of dawn. I'm feeling very helpless and I have no idea what to do, I've tried different approaches and feel like I'm running on empty. And we're not even a week into deployment!
He's so angry, he screams for hours. He kicks, throws things. He doesn't want to sleep for nap time or bedtime. If you know this child, he LOVES sleep. He's slept through the night at 3wks old, and I'd always have to WAKE him from nap and in the morning. But not anymore, he refuses to sleep. He wakes up all night long-as if he were an infant, and is up by 6am everyday. I'm doing my best to be consistant & repetitive. Time outs don't work. A friend of mine suggested to distract him by blowing in his face-HUGE negative, I just end up out've breath. Try things with the toys, but nothing changes his stinky mood. Friends have suggested that maybe he's done with naptimes. Which would be totally acceptable, except that he's a terror and absolute nightmare because he's so exhausted. And then he still fights bed time, doesn't sleep through the night & wakes at the crack of dawn. I'm feeling very helpless and I have no idea what to do, I've tried different approaches and feel like I'm running on empty. And we're not even a week into deployment!
Please God, don't let this last long.
BREAKING NEWS:
It is now 8:27pm, and I think I conquered it! Thank God my son isn't as head strong and stubborn as my daughter, because after 10minutes of fighting for a nap, he finally crashed. And when I put him to bed for the night there was NO fussing or complaining. WOOHOOO!!!!!!!! I got this ;o) I've got my confidence back! Yayyy me! In two wks Gav has adjusted to a big boy bed, Said Goodbye to his Daddy, and got rid of his binky for good. It's been a tough week for him, but rightfully so. He didn't want to back down without a fight, he sure as hell gave me one, but I WON :)
It is now 8:27pm, and I think I conquered it! Thank God my son isn't as head strong and stubborn as my daughter, because after 10minutes of fighting for a nap, he finally crashed. And when I put him to bed for the night there was NO fussing or complaining. WOOHOOO!!!!!!!! I got this ;o) I've got my confidence back! Yayyy me! In two wks Gav has adjusted to a big boy bed, Said Goodbye to his Daddy, and got rid of his binky for good. It's been a tough week for him, but rightfully so. He didn't want to back down without a fight, he sure as hell gave me one, but I WON :)
I'm sorry you're having a first week :( I'll keep you in my prayers that it will be a smooth and quick deployment. We'll have to hang out again soon and just chill and sip on wine and watch movies with your kiddos. <3 you!
ReplyDeleteThanks Reagan, yes we do indeed need to get together. But with your hubbies returning I doubt there will be any 3rd Rad get togethers, but definitely let me know when you're free and sick of the hubby and we'll do something, whether it's sit back, chit chat over a few drinkies, or a day at the beach :)
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