Blogging is my therapy

Not entirely sure why so many emotions over came me today, but many things played a role. Sundays consist of Church and Bellows (my favorite Beach on the island, which I normally would go to every weekend with the family, now it's turned into the place I go every Sunday after church, with my support system). While I wish I was sharing these moments with my husband, I'm so grateful to have SOMEONE to spend this time with. For me, it literally is a little piece of Heaven, here on Earth.

For the record, Sunday Service always gets my emotions going, however on this particular Sunday it was the 10th anniversary of September 11th, a day I believe that changed so many American lives. Even if you were not directly effected by it (Meaning you didn't necessarily lose a relative/friend on that horrific day), it still touched our lives individually, in many different ways.

For me, it shook my world. I love this Country, I'm a proud American, and I believe I live in the greatest nation of all.

I'll never forget that day, ironically I was sitting in history class when the incident occurred. So many thoughts crossed my mined, I'll never forget the fear I had, and the fear that is still there, now that I'm a milspouse. I remember being so worried and was concered with the thought that my brother would be drafted. However, there was no draft, but my brother being the brave, proud American he is, joined the Army. As my luck would have it, they did not accept him, due to having a heart murmur, so he then joined the Marines. It's strange how things work, but if it wasn't for 9/11, my brother would probably not have joined the Corps, and I would not be married to my husband, therefore I would not have my two children.

Today, I realize, more then ever, everything happens for a reason. 9/11 didn't happen so I could meet my future husband, but it changed many lives. Our Country came together, people reunited, and I did meet my soulmate. With every negative thing that happens in this life, something good does come of it. It was an eye opener. Like Kiani mentioned today at service, it was proof that God was still here, but that the devil awaits.

I will say, it's unfortunate that it took such a tragedy to occur, to make people realize what was important in this world. Today, the world came together, to remember those who lost their lives, during the attack on America, we prayed for the families who lost a loved one, we prayed for those who have paid the ultimate sacrifice, the troops, the firefighters, among many others. But I have to ask WHY? Why do we only honor each other during these memorials or anniversaries? Why can't we have each others backs every day of the year? Why are people still fighting amongst themselves. Why are people so angry, and so bitter? And thats when I realized, I too was hurt, and upset with things in my life. I decided to release myself of any negativity, and grudges I have held. I'm letting it all go, and letting God, because thats all I can do, with the things I can not control. I don't want to waste any energy, or time on something I can not change myself.

By focusing on the things that are less important, I'm taking away from all that is important, all the good in my life, the positive people who impact it. So from here on out, I'm going to focus on my faith, myself, my children, husband and those dear to my heart.

I just want to add, that the war on terror is a continuous battle, that will never be resolved. No matter how much time we spend in other countries, trying to teach, and train others. Everyone has their opinions on the war, I personally wish no milfamily had to live like we do, but I believe if we completely give up and pull out've these countries, many people will have died in vein. I don't believe for a second, that we can ever fix the 'hatred' that is instilled in these terrorists brain from the moment they are born, however I don't think we should give up trying. We all play a role in each others lives, and a postive role model is far better then a negative. One person can change a 100 lives.

I am a proud Marinewife. A motard at that ;o) I honor my husband, our family and this country. And I will support it & sacrifice, as long as I'm called to do so.